[ Hello, friend. On this beautiful spring day of April the 1st, you will either return to your desk at work or return to the front door of your residence to find a singular red rose in a simple vase, complete with ribbon and mysterious card.
If you deign to move the vase even the slightest bit, you'll find that either: A) the rose is not indeed a rose and squirts you in the face with water. Like, a lot of water. Basically all the water in the vase. Or, B) it is indeed a real flower, but a fake plastic spider or cockroach is launched into your face by some mysterious mechanism rigged onto the vase.
Pick your poison.
(By the way, the card reads, "Been thinking about you, big guy. You feeling horny lately?" With a mark of lipstick in a color that seems eerily similar to the shade of purple that's always on a certain mysterious hooded lady's lips. For the less likely to catch on to that hint, the back of the card is signed, "Just kidding. - K" ]
April 1st
If you deign to move the vase even the slightest bit, you'll find that either: A) the rose is not indeed a rose and squirts you in the face with water. Like, a lot of water. Basically all the water in the vase. Or, B) it is indeed a real flower, but a fake plastic spider or cockroach is launched into your face by some mysterious mechanism rigged onto the vase.
Pick your poison.
(By the way, the card reads, "Been thinking about you, big guy. You feeling horny lately?" With a mark of lipstick in a color that seems eerily similar to the shade of purple that's always on a certain mysterious hooded lady's lips. For the less likely to catch on to that hint, the back of the card is signed, "Just kidding. - K" ]