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[rideme]

"You've got the Iron Bull here. I'm listening.

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.

TEXT | VOICEMAIL | CALLS

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[rideme]

You asked me to find information. That's how I do it.

[That's how he was trained to do it.]

Any Ben-Hassrath worth their shit would do it that way. Habits die hard.

[animated]

Yeah, well, I wasn't expecting all... that.

What's a Ben-Hassrath?

[rideme]

The heart of the many.

Everything from spies to assassins to re-educators. I fell into the first category, mostly. For a while.

[He scrunches up his face.]

Shit, did I forget to mention that?

[animated]

That you were a spy? No, you didn't.

I appreciate all the extra legwork, though. Madigan's club kind of hangs out on the fringes of reality, so I was kind of hoping it might pop up here too. It would give me a way home.

... Also, you'd love the place.

[rideme]

Oh. Well. I was.

[Since he's pretty sure he's fired. And Tal-Vashoth now. Which he is decidedly refusing to think about.]

Not a problem. It wasn't out of the way or anything.

... go on.

[animated]

Well, in my world women can't use the runes I use to cast. Their magic manifests in a single ability- we call them Talents.

For all the ladies at the Griffonix, that just happens to be sex.

[rideme]

... You're shitting me.

[animated]

I am not.

[rideme]

... We're going back to Vegas.

And we're looking harder.

[animated]

[ oh, he has to laugh at that reaction. ]

Sorry to get your hopes up, but I'm going to bank on it not existing in this world.

[rideme]

First, brothels are illegal, then my horns are too big for one of those 'cars', now this.

I'd rather go back into the fuckin' Fade.

[animated]

[ Charlie has no idea what the Fade is, but he's guessing it isn't somewhere nice ]

Come on, it can't be all bad.

[rideme]

Nah, not all.

There's a guy in my bed who's really good with his hands, so. Can't complain too much.

[animated]

[ Charlie arches an eyebrow, a smirk tugging on his lips ] Just my hands?

[rideme]

Oh, more than that. But hey, I'm tired. Going to hold it against me?

[animated]

Depends on what you want me to hold against you. [ okay, he can't even keep a straight face after that one ] God, that was terrible. What have you done to me?

[rideme]

[He just laughs, reaching over to thump Charlie on the shoulder.]

A lot of things, I think. You mad?

[animated]

Nah. Just silently mourning my sense of humor.

[rideme]

We'll give it a little funeral and everything, if you want.

[animated]

No, no. I'm hoping it's only mostly dead.

Which we all know means partially alive.

[rideme]

Riiiiight. Like in that movie, yeah?

[animated]

Just like in that movie, yes.

Anything else exciting happen?

[rideme]

More like what didn't happen.

If you know what I mean.

[animated]

That could mean a whole lot of things, honestly.

[rideme]

I know. I said it on purpose.